Why is self-confidence important to your riding skill and enjoyment?
How we feel about our riding skill is affected by how we feel about ourselves. Having self-confidence means you trust your own judgment and abilities. You value yourself and feel worthy, regardless of any imperfections or of what others might think of you. You have a strong sense of self-worth and self-belief, which is important to our health and psychological well-being.
Self-confidence is crucial to succeeding in life. People who lack self-confidence are less likely to achieve the success that could give them more confidence and the vicious circle continues. Yet so many people are lacking in this area.
It’s a crucial mental skill that you need to be successful in your riding. If you don’t believe you’re good enough or that you can win; you can train as much as you like, but you probably won’t achieve what you hoped.
Having a healthy level (don’t worry you don’t have to turn into a braggadocious!) of self-confidence can help you become successful in all aspects of your life, including your riding.
Benefits of self-confidence; Why you should improve your self-confidence
Let’s look at more of the positive effects self-confidence has;
- Healthier relationships: Self-confidence obviously improves how you feel about yourself, but it helps you understand others better.
- Improved performance: You’ll perform better when you feel confident, as you won’t have to waste time and energy worrying that you aren’t good enough.
- High levels of resilience: Self-belief enhances your ability to bounce back from challenges or adversities.
- Openness to new ideas: Putting yourself out there is a lot easier if you have confidence in yourself and in your abilities.
O.K. so now we know we need it, how do we improve self-confidence? Luckily for us there are things you can start doing today to improve self-confidence.
Let’s take action now and become the most confident version of yourself you can be. Here are 11 ways to improve your self-confidence;
1. Be authentic
While it’s important to learn from others, it’s also crucial to stay true to yourself. Tap into your authentic feelings by thinking back to a moment you were feeling very confident or proud. Let that feeling sink in. Try to relive how it felt in all the detail, the sights, sounds, smells, everything about it. Now acknowledge how that feels. This can now act as an internal barometer against which you can measure other feelings against. This will help you highlight the ones which feel removed from this proud, authentic optimum.
2. Change up your physical state
Your physical state significantly influences your self-confidence. When you change your physical state, you can change the way you think and feel. You can help to trigger the most confident version of yourself by taking on a confident body posture; chest out, chin up and shoulders back. You can also trigger this confident physical state by the clothes you wear. I’m sure you’ve had times when you’ve put on an outfit that has immediately made you feel great and stand with greater confidence.
3. Reverse engineer
Often our long term goals can seem like a huge mountain to climb, which may trigger feelings of inadequacy. While it’s important to have long-term (outcome) goals, it’s much more productive (and better for your self-confidence) to break them down into mini goals, which will lead you to your long-term goal.
These smaller goals are process-oriented goals and they’re completely within your control. For example, your goal might be to compete at the Nationals. You can then break this down to individual shows and what you have to do at these shows, rather than the outcome (e.g. winning the class). Your process goals could be “keep the rhythm regular’, ‘keep your horse in front of the leg’, ‘ride accurately’. Anything that will help you focus on, and improve, the process. Rather than focusing purely on the outcome, which is affected by so many factors outside of your control.
4. Switch expectation for feel
High expectations can negatively impact your self-confidence. While I want everyone to strive to perform to the best of their ability, I don’t want people to focus solely on winning. If it doesn’t go your way, does it ruin the ride or even the day? If so, then your expectations are probably too high. So instead of having an expectation – ‘I want to win’, switch it for how you want to feel instead. Maybe you want it to feel relaxed and harmonious?
5. Don’t try too hard
Make sure you’re not becoming obsessed about reaching certain results. This can make you forget why you started riding in the first place. You may start to panic that you might not be good enough to reach this goal. Let go of the limiting belief that you’re not good enough and remind yourself why you love riding. Focus on this and you’ll automatically be more confident.
6. Stop comparison
‘Comparison is the thief of joy’
It’s not often that comparisons are a healthy pastime. In 2018 a study by Vrabel, Zeigler-Hill and Southard found that there’s a direct link between envy and the way you feel about yourself. People who compared themselves to others experienced envy. The more envy they felt, the worse they felt about themselves.
If you feel envious of someone else, remind yourself of your own successes and strengths. You could also keep an ongoing gratitude journal to help you keep your focus on the good parts of your own life.
7. Embrace self-doubt
Do you ever feel like you put things off until you feel more confident? Maybe you don’t go for the lesson or on the hack with a friend because you don’t quite feel ready. Sometimes the best way to gain more confidence is by taking action and doing the thing anyway. Showing up before you’re ready, imperfectly and learning on the way.
Identify the fears that come from a lack of self confidence, then practice facing them. Just try. Don’t wait to feel 100% ready because chances are you’ll never feel like that.
Embracing a little self-doubt could actually improve your performance. Woodman, Akehurst, Hardy and Beattie in their 2010 study found that athletes who embraced their self-doubt outperformed athletes who were 100 percent confident in themselves.
When you face your fears and try difficult things, you’ll improve your self-confidence so much.
8. Surround yourself with positive people
We all have friends who light up a room and make you feel happy just to be near them. You’ve probably also experienced energy vampires too….. Pay close attention to how the people in your life make you feel. Do your friends give you energy or take it? Are you lifted up by their presence or do they bring you down? Do they judge you or accept you?
We are all influenced by the people we spend the most time with. They influence our attitudes and thoughts about ourselves. If you realise you always feel down on yourself after spending time with a specific person, then it’s time to distance yourself from this person. Surround yourself with people want only the best for you and who love you.
9. Take care of your body
Here are a few self-care practices which have been linked to higher levels of self-confidence:
- Sleep: We all know that not getting enough sleep can negatively affect your emotions. Grumpy anyone?! Good quality sleep has been linked with positive personality traits, such as optimism and self-esteem.
- Diet: Fuelling your body with the right foods makes you feel energised, stronger and healthier, which also makes you feel better about yourself. Boosting self-confidence and self-esteem.
- Meditation: Meditation boosts self-confidence in a few ways; Self-acceptance is a big one, it also helps you to stop quieten the negative self-talk which affects your self-confidence.
- Exercise: In 2016 Sani et al published a study which found regular physical activity improved the participants’ body image and when their body image improved, they also felt more confident.
10. Be kind to yourself
When you make a mistake or fail at something treat yourself with kindness. It’s been found that those of us who can be compassionate to ourselves have higher levels of self-confidence.
In 2009 Neff found that self-compassion contributes to more consistent confidence. So the next time you’re in a challenging situation, remember that no-one is perfect. We’re all just doing our best.
11. Practice positive self-talk
The way you talk to yourself is really important. If you use positive self-talk this can help reduce self-doubt, allow you to thrive in the face of challenges and develop more self-compassion. Using negative self-talk damages your confidence and puts a ceiling on your abilities by convincing your subconscious mind that you’re not good enough to do it.
The next time you start to think in a way that is putting limits on your abilities and what you can achieve remind yourself that your thoughts aren’t always accurate.
Challenging negative self-talk and reframing your thoughts into a more positive way of thinking?
- Stop saying “I can’t do it” or “This is impossible”, stop, take a breath and remind yourself that “You can do it,” you just “have have to try.”
- Stop telling yourself “I never do anything right”, remind yourself “I can improve next time.”
- Don’t say you “hate” public speaking. Choose a less loaded word like “don’t like.” In this moment remind yourself that everyone has strengths and weaknesses.
Remember that everyone struggles with confidence issues at one time or another, it’s totally natural. You can do so much to improve your self-confidence, but if your self-confidence issues are interfering with your education, life, work, social life, you should consider seeking help from a mental health professional.
Do you suffer with low confidence? Which of these tips are you going to try to improve your self-confidence?
SEE ALSO: 15 ways to become a more confident rider